Fighting Failure
I'm struggling bad to get back on track....I was so close before Christmas and then I just derailed and am having the hardest time just doing the right thing.
I find myself all over the place and I need to figure out how to get back to center.
I'm not tracking anything really, I have no goals that I can get a concrete hold on...I'm all over the place.

Today I got back on the scale...I'm 308.8...not bad, not great.
I'm having the hardest time breaking that 300.00

I need to be accountable to myself, I need to have balance, I need to be happy.
I am none of those things.

I'm a mess...I think all the time that I have cancer or a blood clot and am minutes away from dying.
I'm eating like crap....I can't tell you the last time I had 5 fresh fruits and/or veg in a day.
I'm not sleeping well at all.
I'm focusing on all the wrong things.

I feel lost.
I feel unworthy.
I feel sad.

I have to find my way back otherwise I'm gonna die.